Youth LEAD OKC made new friends at Sunday's meeting and @ Metro Career Academy
Goal: Get to know Metro Career Academy, the student ambassadors and share YLOKC
11:30 Casady students gathered at the Harper Wing
11:45 Casady, Heritage, and Mercy School Institute drove to Metro Career Academy. Shannon ordered Pizza. Cost of activity: $127.25 and Sweet Reflection: $ 12.52
12:00-12:15 Students arrived to Metro Career Academy
Mrs. Clay and Mr. McDowell drive Casady and HH students. Mercy School Principal, Mrs. Jawayyd drove Mercy students Parents drove students from Classen and Capitol Hill.
Proposed Schedule of Monday, December 7th Program.
Process of the December 7th event finalized at December 6th meeting
Youth LEAD takes tour of Metro Tech
Youth LEAD hosts program
Update: 30 minutes for a tour of the school, 1 hour for the program and 15 minutes for clean-up, feedback and evaluation
Welcome by Student Ambassadors, Tour of the School, and Pizza lunch
1:00 - 2:00 Program by Youth LEAD OKC
Name tags: Chloey Handouts: Agnish Time Keeper: Amira
a. Introduction by Johnny
-Sheet Johnny, Hallie, Mallory
-Sheet Johnny, Hallie, Mallory
Basic Principles of Debriefing
Reflection – What?
Describe what went on during the activity. This focuses on both the task (actual work done) and the process (i.e. the interactions of the group members during the activity, how the work was done.)
Generalization - (So What?)
Describes what the group learned from the experience, i.e. what did it mean to them.
Explores the consequence of what happened and did not happen. Asks the group to assess whether it accomplished what it set out to achieve.
Transfer – (Now What?)
This section describes the process of taking the learning and reapplying it to other situations (another activity or real situations outside the program). This section engages participants in a process of self-examination and reflection. It provides opportunities for change and growth.
1. What happened?
2. Has it happened before?
3. Are you satisfied with the results? Why or why not?
4. Is it similar to or different from your experiences in school or work?
5. Does this tell us anything about our group or ourselves?
6. What would you like to do about______ for the next activity or when you return home?
c. Youth LEAD Skills -
- I am Daniela and Ryan
Audience: Participants looking to explore the role of stereotypes and what they look and feel like when attached to an individual that they know.
Flipchart with unlined pages
Sticky notes, if facilitating alternate version
Skewers, if facilitating alternate debrief
Time: This activity will take 30 minutes
Goal: To gain an increased awareness about stereotypes, what they are, and how they hurt us.
This is a three stage activity: participants will think about the biases they carry within them; they will understand the way stereotypes pervade our society; and finally they will also think about what people can do to counter harmful stereotypes.
Setting the Scene: We all hold our own stereotypes and we all live in a world full of them. Let’s get them all out on the table, the ones we hold, the ones we have heard and even the ones that confuse us . . .
1. Share the goal and a brief definition of stereotype: an oversimplified generalization about a particular group of people that doesn’t take into account their individuality.
2. Write categories around the room on flip chart paper, one category per paper.
3. The 5 or 6 categories chosen should be specific to and representative of the group. Some examples are Jewish, Female, Teens, Hindu, College student, etc.
4. Give each participant a marker. Ask them to visit each sheet around the room, and write down one or more stereotypes they have heard or believe about each group on the
*Remind them that they do not have to personally believe the stereotype, but it can just be something they’ve heard. This should increase personal safety.
5. When participants have finished writing, facilitators will choose a poster that they identify with and ask for participant volunteers to stand next to a poster of a group that they identify with (one participant per poster).
6. Starting with facilitators, have each volunteer read off the stereotypes one by one, starting each with “I am . . . “ For example, I am Omar, I am Muslim, I am a terrorist . “
Communicate, Facilitate, Organize Training © 2009 provided by Youth LEAD, Inc. www.youthleadonline.org 781-784-0651
1. What did it feel like to do this exercise?
2. How does seeing this make you feel?
3. Is it okay to use stereotypes if you don’t mean anything by it?
4. What is the impact of “positive” stereotypes?
a. What is a positive stereotype?
b. Is there such a thing as a positive stereotype?
5. Did anything surprise you?
6. What are you hearing in the halls at school? Why those?
7. How do teachers administrators respond when they hear these?
8. Where do these come from?
It may be helpful to use the analogy that stereotyping is like smog-we can’t breathe it
Often there is a grain of truth to the stereotypes; how were some of them distorted,
It is important to clarify that this “truth” does not provide a rationale for the
in; it’s bad information, doesn’t mean we are bad people, or that people belonging to the groups are bad. added value judgment, oversimplified, to become hurtful? For example, there are historic roots to the stereotype that “all Jews are wealthy”, that began in the Middle Ages when Jews were not allowed to own land and got involved in banking and loaning money, one of the few professions open to Jews at the time. Don’t worry-you don’t need to know the historic roots to each one to ask the question, but can solicit their thoughts.
stereotypes, but adds an element of history to them. It is important that the facilitator emphasize that the histories are to help us understand and loosen the stereotypes. If individuals have information on “all Jews are wealthy” or “Hindus are cow lovers” stereotypes—and understand the significance and historical ties of each to a person—it will be harder for these individuals to accept and use these stereotypes.
You can also alter this activity by having participants put their stereotypes on sticky notes.
o Read the notes out loud and physically stick them to the person who represents that particular stereotype.
o Once this is completed ask the group – What can we do to remove these
stereotypes forever? Each idea removes a sticky.
o You can also do this with the flip chart (each idea crosses out a stereotype) if
there is a personal space issue.
Communicate, Facilitate, Organize Training © 2009 provided by Youth LEAD, Inc. www.youthleadonline.org 781-784-0651
Another way to debrief is to get everyone to stand in a circle.
o Hand out one skewer to each person.
o Have them share the most surprising stereotype they’ve ever heard about their
o After they say the stereotype, they pass their skewer to the next person
o At the end, the facilitator should have a bundle of skewers and make the point own group.
o Analogous to stereotypes that we may hold and not think twice about but if
that one skewer seems harmless (reminds you of kebobs, yum) but a bundle of
skewers can do quite a bit of damage. Everyone holds stereotypes, it can be really damaging to a community.
- Deep Listening ON PARKING LOT - NO time
Audience: This activity is a good beginning activity for any communication, facilitation, or dialogue forum. It is optimal with a newly created group.
chairs for each participant
Time: 45 minutes
Goal: To understand the importance of listening, the qualities of a good listener, and the importance and qualities of clarifying questions.
Setting the scene: We all think we are good communicators if we can convey our point to an audience. However, speaking is just half of the communication dynamic. Listening is just as important, and is often the forgotten tool in communication. This activity will help us listen more actively and ask clarifying questions to deepen our conversations.
1. Have each youth find a partner who they know little to nothing about. This is a point to stress—no cheating! Take a risk.
2. When they have a partner, ask them to get comfortable in a good listening position in a space where they can really focus on what their partner has to say.
3. Each pair chooses one person to be a speaker and one to be a listener.
1. Role of the Speaker:
a. Talk uninterrupted for two minutes about the following topic: a piece of their
personal history, an experience, an idea that they carry with them that would
really help their partner understand them.
b. Role of the Listener: Be silently attentive to the speaker.
2. When two minutes have passed, the facilitator asks that the speaker wrap up his/her thought and then focus their attention on larger group to address some of the following questions:
a. To speaker:
i. What was it like to speak uninterrupted for two minutes? If it was
ii. What was the listener doing?
uncomfortable, why was it uncomfortable?
b. To listener:
i. What was it like to listen without speaking? What was hard? What did you
ii. What did you feel yourself doing?
c. How can focusing only on the listening aspect of conversation help us be better communicators? like about it?
3. Ask each pair to switch roles.
4. When two minutes have passed, the facilitator asks the speaker wrap up his/her thought and then face out to conduct a small de-brief with the entire group:
a. Was anything different this time?
b. What did you notice about the speaker/listener?
1. Briefly describe the definition of a clarifying question and its role in fostering positive communication.
Tips for being a good listener
Give your full attention to the person who is speaking. Look at them, don't look out the window or at what else is going on in the room.
Make sure your mind is focused. It can be easy to let your mind wander if you think you know what the person is going to say next, but you might be wrong! If you feel your mind wandering, change the position of your body and try to concentrate on the speaker's words.
Let the speaker finish before you begin to talk. Speakers appreciate having the chance to say everything they would like to say without being interrupted. When you interrupt, it looks like you aren't listening, even if you really are.
Let yourself finish listening before you begin to speak! You can't really listen if you
are busy thinking about what you want say next.
Listen for main ideas. The main ideas are the most important points the speaker wants to
get across. They may be mentioned at the start or end of a talk, and repeated a number of
times. Pay special attention to statements that begin with phrases such as "My point is..."
or "The thing to remember is..."
Ask questions. If you are not sure you understand what the speaker has said, just ask. It
is a good idea to repeat in your own words what the speaker said so that you can be sure your understanding is correct. For example, you might say, "When you said that no two zebras are alike, did you mean that the stripes are different on each one?"
Give feedback. Sit up straight and look directly at the speaker. (Keep in mind any cultural considerations regarding eye contact). Now and then, nod to show that you understand. At appropriate points you may also smile, frown, laugh, or be silent. These are all ways to let the speaker know that you are really listening. Remember, you listen with your face as well as your ears!
Ask Clarifying questions
Clarifying questions will help you bring out additional information on a topic, clarify how someone feels about a topic, or further explain a complex idea.
Open-ended. They force deeper thinking and as the speaker to “own” their responses. Close-ended questions, which require only a yes or no response, put the accountability right back on you to ask a follow-up question.
Not imbedded with solutions. Be careful to avoid a subtle or inferred solution or preference in your questions. Your goal is to collect information, not impose your point of view.
Examples of Clarifying questions:
“I can tell that your are really upset. Let me see if I can get this right: You are most concerned about…”
"I'm feeling upset by what you just said. Did you just mean ... (understood meaning) by that?"
"It seems you are angry about something. Can you share what it is that is really troubling you here?"
This question offers a chance to clarify the reason for anger. The question enables the person to then explain and possibly diffuse the negative feeling up front, rather than have it escalate into conflict. By asking this question, you might nip a potential fight in the bud and turn a thorn into a rose.
"You know, what you just said seemed odd to me. Did you just mean ... (implied meaning) or am I reading into this?"
This question enables the listener to make sure s/he understood the speakers’ intended meaning,
without making assumptions that may not reflect the speaker’s point of view.
2. Ask the group to describe qualities of a clarifying question. Things to look for: gets below the surface, focuses on feelings, makes the person think, listens between the lines
3. Ask the group to come up with some clarifying questions—make sure they are clarifying questions before they go into their pair groups. It is important that they completely understand this part before moving on!
4. To practice asking clarifying questions, have students face their partners again.
5. The first speaker talks for two minutes answering the following question: “What tensions do you experience because of who you are or what you believe?”
6. This time the listener may ask clarifying questions, but may not make statements. Don’t forget to keep up the listening.
7. When two minutes have passed, the facilitator asks the speaker to wrap up his/her thought and then face out to de-brief the activity:
a. What was this like for you this time as a speaker? What was this like for you this time as a listener?
b. What was difficult? What did you enjoy?
c. What are some questions that your partner asked that were really good examples of clarifying questions? How did you know?
8. Ask each pair to switch roles. This time encourage the listener to focus on the questions they choose to ask.
Process the entire activity by asking the participants what they learned about their partners and what they learned about themselves.
How can focusing only on listening and asking questions help them become better communicators?
How can you use this in your group work?
How can you use this in other areas of your life?
Notes: In this activity two things are very important.
1. Explore the discomfort that participants experience when they are silent.
a. Why is it hard to talk for an extended amount of time without our partner
b. Could it be because we are used to being interrupted?
c. Could it be because we seek confirmation from people that what we are sharing is “worthy”?
2. Give clear examples to make sure that participants understand the definition of a“clarifying question”.
a. Describe how it can be used to really change the way we converse.
b. Share how asking clarifying questions can help create mutual understanding.
Next meeting January 10th at Oklahoma City National Memorial and Museum, 1:30-4:30 PM